For those about to rock we salute you
The dirty thoughts for dirty minds we contribute to
A 12″ that combines the dastardly deeds of Nebuchadnezzar, Mario Andretti’s driving, J.D Salinger, Jerry Lee Falwell, AC/DC, Charles Dickens, Black Oak Arkansas, (my own personal style guru) Alfred E Newman and Black Flag? Read on, gentle reader.
You gotta love the best gang on the planet dropping their particular thang at the absolute peak of their powers. The Beastie Boys An Exciting Evening At Home With Shadrach, Mesach And Abednego was such a moment back in 1989; well, almost.
Now I will freely admit that as an opinionated yet cynical dullard I have often been way behind the curve on all manner of great bands: Metallica? shite thrash; Pixies? indie snore bores; Pulp? untalented wastrels; Guns ‘n Roses? untalented Faster Pussycat wannabes; Coldplay? I don’t know whether to despise them most for being pretentious, or boring – actually, maybe I’m not always wrong*. I occasionally get things very right though.
The Beasties served up Paul’s Boutique in July ’89 and the LP now hailed as ‘the Sgt Peppers of hip hop’ was almost universally reviled at the time. I bought it very cheap after it had been out for a month and my brother and I became the only people outside the band who loved it, I mean REALLY loved it. It was a giant, groovy, funny splash of colour across a decidedly black and white musical scene; we listened to it intensively for months. 31 years later I am still having a great time spotting all the samples.
It only took me 29 years to buy an import copy of the US 12″ An Exciting Evening At Home With Shadrach, Mesach And Abednego** released 3 months later. Along with a great cover of those three Hebrew gentlemen^ and a decidedly hep back cover, the lure was 4 non-album tracks.
‘Shadrach’ really is the B-Boys at their very best. It is an explosive, funky and delirious fun ride. The sampling, including Black Oak Arkansas, Sly Stone and James Brown, is immaculate, diverse and amusing as always. The band bounce their best rhymes around in their patented triangular fashion, it makes me laugh and want to dance; job done. Favourite rhyme is a difficult pick but I’m going to go with ‘Jerry Lee Falwell’ with ‘drives his car well’, right after a dope smoking reference:
Smoke the holy chalice got my own religion Rally round the stage and check the funky dope musicians Just like Jerry Lee Swaggart or Jerry Lee Falwell You like Mario Andretti 'cause he always drives his car well
Mmm, how you like that Mr Andretti?^
I’ll leave any discussion of the Paul’s Boutique track ‘Car Thief’ to a review of that LP^^, needless to say it’s fucking great. Let’s hit up them bonus tracks!
It’s a 50/50 split, two great worthwhile additions to the Beastie canon and two sub-par jokey, unworthy sexist throwbacks.
Putting the shit before the shovel, the jokey faux-loverman ‘Some Dumb Cop Gave Me Two Tickets Already’ is abysmal. Yup, we get that it’s a joke but it’s neither funny nor musically interesting enough to merit a second listen, it’s Goldie Lookin’ Chain B-side material, at a push.
‘Your Sister’s Def’ (although sadly for her, probably not deaf) is an acapella demo of a track by Dr Dre^* and it’s just every vile hip hop sex rhyme you’ve ever heard, except less well done; ‘I start to dive, pummel her rumble fish‘, really Dr? Really?
(makes fart noises)
The bad and the ugly dismissed, let us hit the good on Shadrach in honour of a certain deceased maestro. Both ‘Caught In The Middle Of A 3-Way Mix’ and ‘And What You Give Is What You Get’ are both superb.
Both tracks are remixes, early mixes, re-servings of big chunks of Paul’s Boutique, showing off differing samples and emphasis. ‘Caught …’ starting with an extended version of the radio ad for, the fictional, Paul’s Boutique clothing shop was particularly thrilling, but I’m a nerd. ‘And What You …’ is more upbeat, fuelled by a brilliant Black Flag sample part-way through and a chunk lifted wholesale from the Jam ‘Start!’*^. Producers the Dust Brothers earning their percentage, good style.
Both tracks are essential to any half-serious Beastiequarian and well worth the getting. Sublime.
Steal from the rich and I’m out robbing banks
Give it to the poor and I always give thanks
Because they got more stories than J.D’s got Salinger
I hold the title and you are the challenger
I’ve got money like Charles Dickens
I’ve got the girlies in the Couple like the Colonel’s got the chickens
And I always go out dapper like Harry S. Truman
I’m madder than Mad’s Alfred E. Newman
1022 Down.
*I have actually said all these things about all these bands, occasionally without ever having heard a note of their music.
**henceforth referred to as Shadrach to avoid terminal finger fatigue.
^as you know from chapter 3 of the Book Of Daniel, the three were thrown into a fiery furnace after refusing to bow to the image of the nefarious king Nebuchadnezzar and miraculously preserved. More to the point, Sly & The Family Stone chant their names over and over in the track ‘Loose Booty’ which is sampled herein.
^a man not often referenced in popular music, to my knowledge.
^^roughly scheduled for April 2028 at the rate I’m currently going. Life keeps getting in the way of blogging.
^*not the NWA one, another one from Yo! MTV Raps.
*^which they later covered during their, for me underwhelming, Hello Nasty days.